Why I Fell Off Lucid Dreaming And Manifesting (And What Brought Me Back)

My last post on this site went up in September 2023. A few months later I stopped everything. I stopped writing down my dreams, stopped looking for signs, stopped doing anything related to lucid dreaming or manifestation. For almost three years I didn't touch any of it.

I want to tell you what happened, because if you've ever fallen off something that used to mean everything to you, you might see some of yourself in this.

The Year That Was Supposed To Be Different

I was convinced that 2023 was the year I was going to die, at age 33. Around that time, one of my best friends came back into my life. She was also a former partner. She was the one who pushed me to keep going with all of this.

We had all these plans for what we called a "lucid year." We started a podcast and we were creating things together.

Then she decided to cut me off and stop working with me completely. We haven't talked since.

How I Fell Off Completely

I can't explain how much that one moment took out of me. It killed my spirit and everything I had built up to that point. I lost faith in all of it.

So I just stopped. No more dream journal. No more looking for synchronicities. No more reality checks or imagining the life I wanted before falling asleep. I didn't slowly drift away from it, I walked away from it all at once.

The first thing I noticed was that life just felt less magical in general. And honestly, I got into a really bad state. I started drinking more. I was hiding inside more. I'm not going to pretend it was some peaceful break. It was a dark stretch and it lasted for months.

The Dream That Changed Everything

Here's the part I still think about. After a few months of living like that, I had a dream telling me I should apply to film school.

I had walked away from everything to do with dreams, and a dream is what pulled me out. I decided to go back to school and just see what happened.

It ended up being one of the best decisions I've ever made. Film school led me to start my own videography business, which is what I had always wanted to do. I graduated this year and I've been running the company since.

Why I'm Coming Back To Let's Get Lucid

Even with the business going, something inside me kept pulling me back here. So I started small, by rebuilding this website.

Then I started rereading all my old posts. Reading about how I got started with lucid dreaming after my grandma passed, and everything I learned from Neville Goddard and Seth, reminded me why I started this in the first place. Somewhere in the middle of that, the motivation came back.

If you've fallen off something you used to love, I don't have a perfect answer for you. What worked for me was starting with one small thing that felt connected to who I used to be, and letting that lead to the next thing.

What's Next

I'm back, and this time I'm not keeping it to just this blog. I'm going to be active on Instagram, TikTok and YouTube again. New posts are coming here too.

And to the friend who left my life, wherever you are, I hope you're doing well and I hope you're out there chasing your dream too.

Thanks for still being here.